R5: The Bump is back, and it makes disturbing viewing

A few bad bumps, counter bumps and a lot of confusion this week. Here are 3 of the more sickening. A word of warning: once you've seen these they cannot be unseen.

And if you thought that was bad you may not want to watch this one: 

But this is surely the most stomach-churning of them all:

Oh god, you just know they're swingers... 

How did these people ever become a dance troupe?

ANZAC Round: Almost my last post.

That was a long, long week of footy and thank god it's over. I only watched one game in its entirety this week and I didn't enjoy it one little bit. Was sorely tempted to walk away and keep walking.
Thankfully footy is bigger than footy. It's also the Drunk, and there were a few Drunk encounters this week - at the G on a stirring ANZAC Eve (stirring pre-game at least) and at PunchDrink 1 at The Corner last Thursday. Some very familiar and very old faces, a damn good night and here are some snaps to prove it.

The Ladder: Trobby and Phil are still hanging at the top of the tree, a little movement up and down in the ranks. Taffa the big slider, Titto the biggest riser. Franco, who it was great to see at the Drink has well and truly thrown himself into the mix with his 7.

R4: The Grand Old White Flag

When the going got tough this week half the teams in the league called a cab and went home. None more abruptly than The Demons. It was like it was their shout and they suddenly realised they'd left their wallets at home.
I could go on... in fact I will. More self indulgent rant here.

A bunch of badness...

A disturbance in the footy universe this week, unsettling results and a very disturbing thought: What if the Tigers can actually achieve two impossibilities in successive years? Not only winning a flag last year, but also NOT following through with the promised hang-over this year.

Here's what went wrong this week: The Pies won, Bombers won, North won. That's a pretty heinous start to anyone's week right there. And did I mention the Hawks/Dees match?

There's good news however, this week sees the annual Dons v Pies Anzac Day clash where, lest we forget, it's our national duty as Australians to heartily barrack for casualties by the end of the battle.

That brings us to The Drunk ladder which is slowly taking some sort of shape:

Drum Major Trobby is leading the troops this week, jumping three spots and pushing the Panther out of the tree. Phil Smith's hot on his tail and Lloydy's judgement is slightly better than mine to snare third. Taffa, Tassy, Ian and Frankie round out the top 8.

The big winner this week, however, is BobCatter Sammy, jumping 12 spots to be well within striking distance.

Biggest Loser this week was Franco SKN, down 9 after what you would have thought was a reasonable 5 correct tips.

Tara looks set for a good stayer's race, otherwise the field is pretty-well bunched a long way from the straight.

R4: If you don't mind, vampire!

So, there I was playing footy and I saw this bloke's neck and thought... "what the hey, looks tasty. Why not?" A mere three weeks for big Mac's not-so-happy meal thanks.  Is Don. Is Bad. 

The first PunchDrunk catch up is happening NEXT THURSDAY EVENING for those who can make it and are keen for some serious and intelligent footy talk. Or a load of flippant and ignorant rubbish, depending on what floats your boat.
The aim is to make it an easy get for as many as possible (transport hubs, fairly central) Richmond came out a nose ahead of the CBD so let's put the democratic process to bed and head to the Corner Hotel Rooftop again, anytime after about 5.30 (earlier the better, help me grab a table). Hope to see you there.

Hooroo Roo Hoodoo

Intergenerational weakness is endlessly fascinating. Especially on a team or club level.

How do the Roos, who have been no world-beaters for yonks, manage to beat the Demons for 16 straight games? Likewise, the Saints, while unarguably better than the Dees for the last decade, I'd argue not to the extent borne out but their 18 game winning streak.

Maybe blame a lop-sided tally of games played at the Docklands Terror-dome (another Demon hoodoo/weakness - not a single game won there in 24 attempts over an 8 year losing streak) and in wind-blown Tassy.

And of course the Demons were particularly shit for a decade, but even Hawks (13-game streak) and the Cats (11-game streak) didn't embarrass us as much and they were actually good.

Weakness of mind, spirit, culture and heart. The chinless-elite factor. Lack of belief from top to bottom of the club (that'd be me).


Anyhoo, Roo hoodoo busted this week thank Jehovah, the Saints one in R1 last year.
So now there's only finals (11 year absence) and a Premiership (54 year drought) to take care of.

Enough of them, here's us, and nothing between anyone pretty much. Panther (Taffa) has clawed his way to the lead based on some good margin calls, but the first 7 are equal on 18 wins. We've got 17s and 16s all the way down to 23rd.

Tassy's back from Greece full of steam and storming into the 8. And you know Coxy Catfish left the country before last round, cos he's just shot up 15 places to be seriously in contention. Last time he was disconnected from the footy-teat for most of the season he won the Cup.

R3: Dead dogs, cold pies, dud tips.

Are these the real Dogs? How long can Eddie and Bucks survive if the Pies continue to go winless? What happened to my tips?

Weird start to a long-awaited season. Form teams totally out of form, sinking teams suddenly floating. It's gonna be a long stressy season.

Easter tipping: Getting hot & cross

Just when you thought you knew what's what...
AFL Equalisation is on track to put the Hawks back near top after just two seasons being only as good as everyone else. The Dogs are back down buried with their bones. The Saints momentarily fluttered Icarus-like, but look to have melted wings once more. The Demons still refuse to take their chances. Borderline at best.
A further slap in the face, the scragging shin-boners are levitating way above their rightful place. Balancing that, the Pies are doing as well as decent-thinking, clean-living, non-dentally-challenged humans would hope.
It's early days, you could still throw a blanket over everyone, but there's a definite sense of some teams being on, and others way off.
Which brings us to US. Nothing much to see yet, but some worrying signs.
Garth leads and he has form. He always seems to be thereabouts. Watch him. Frankie 'da Godfather' Materia is second. Multiple previous winner and not to be taken lightly.
Another former Drunk Champ Lex is third. Red light. A lax start saw her miss the first game of the season. No probs. She's caught up already. She's being nice to us. Trust her not.
Leah 'Champs' Champion rounds out our 12-point Drunks. Been close several times and need I point out her name. Watch your backs.