The Good, The Bad, The Off-Season

Plasticware!

Off-season. It's called that cos it's... well, a bit off isn't it? Controversy, carnivals and camps (or not, depending on the cut of your gib).

My mum always said "Never trust a carnie, they're all a bit weird" (mind you she said the same about the Beatles) - The AFLX - What a Zooper Joke. Pop-Footy for those with the concentration of a goldfish. Oh... hang on the Dees won their first bit of (plastic) silver-ware since 1989? I love it!

Then there'e the AFLW comp. Last year it was a seriously successful achievement, a shining light for the AFL and was this season basically torn down by them. Criticised by their patrons for game-style and a Grand Final rudely set in the middle of the 1st round of AFL proper. What I saw was good, hard honest footy again.

How about the new Match Review Panel? This year consisting of a panel of one (Go Pies).

Like everything, there's good and bad. The Jack watts fire-sale (maybe good), but then he goes and kicks 6 in his first game with Power, the first time he's ever kicked more than 4 (probably bad).

The best off-season news though is the new clash strips - no enforced white! Footy jumpers that look like footy jumpers. I haven't seen serial offenders Hawks version yet, but the Dees have gone 70/80s retro and are channeling the lies of Robbie Flower, Gerard Healy, Gary Baker and Jacko. That can't be bad.

Now the circus nightmare is over we can stop dreaming and start losing again for real and no-one's more excited about that than me.

I can't remember a season that looks more like a mine-field of icebergs. We are explorers with neither map nor torch nor ice-breaker nor mine sweeper. All we have to guide us is a random bag of mixed metaphors and they're no use to anyone.

So, to the Tigers. Are they any good? Will the Port trip to the Opp Shop pay dividends? Can the media and the AFL pump the Dons up enough to get them there on a balloon of hot air and belief? Can the Lions' talented young turks take them far enough before they all head back home in a couple of years? Will the Pies finish above 10th? Can the GWS put enough substance (and I don't mean Dons/WCE kind of substance) behind the talent to do what they probably should have for the past two seasons? Can the Dees grow enough ticker to finally stop breaking our hearts. Will the Roos get done for tanking?

Strap yourself in. We're about to find out.